Thoughts from the Pulpit
If this is in fact true than we as men have clearly underestimated women.
Again.
It’s that time of year again when car enthusiasts all over Ontario awake from their coma-like winter state in time to attend the Auto Show. So a couple of friends of mine decided to head on out to see what was there. As we walked through the maze of cars we finally ended up seeing some the more erotic….err I mean exotic cars that were on display. We saw the Lambos, the Ferrari’s, the Aston Martins and the very rare V12 Mercedes McLaren V12 SLR convertible panty remover. A bargain at a mere $495,000 U.S. You would never think to use the word bargain when referring to an exotic car. Or how about Value? Yes Virginia, believe it or not there is value in an exotic car and it depends on whether or not you’re a man or a women on how you look at it.
Lets take the Ferrari 612 Scaglietti. Not the best version of a Ferrari hyper-car but still a very good example of luxury meets grabbing someone by the throat and beating their head to a Celine Dion song. Both men and women appreciate this car albeit from different points of the spectrum. For men it’s about image – “my penis will seem larger if I drive this” and for women it’s about how the car works with their lifestyle – “I don’t care how big he thinks his penis is I still manage to fall asleep, besides the colour will match my Manolo Blahniks.” For $395,000 U.S. your purchase comes complete with two plane tickets to the plant in Maranello Italy to have:
1)Your seat custom molded to your ass and..
2)To help you select your custom interior finishes with the aide of their design team.
Yes…that’s right. A DESIGN Team. It’s not enough that one design professional tell you that you have the aesthetic flare of the Dugger Family on TLC, but now Ferrari sees fit to have that point made painfully clear to you by an entire committee. OH JOY! So let’s recap here. For him – the ego stroke he needs, for her – a trip to Italy.
A women would read the specification on this car as:
“The 612 Scaglietti shares its naturally aspirated 5.7 L V12 engine with the 575M Maranello. The engine produces 533 hp at 7250 rpm and 433 ft/lbs of torque at 5250 rpm with a compression ratio of 11.2:1. The car is capable of 315 km/hr and has a 100 km/h time of 4.3 seconds. It comes with two six speed transmission options: a conventional manual or the F1A semi-automatic paddle shift system, a much refined version of the F1 system in the 360.”
A man would read the same specification like this:
“The 612 “Some Italian name I can’t pronounce properly but sounds really pompous,” shares its well endowed 5.7L Grunt filled V12 engine with the 575 Maranello. The engine produces more than 533 hp of testosterone, which coincidently, is enough to actually convert Meghan Fox into a man if there was any truth to that Internet rumor. It also has enough torque that translates into more “oohs,” “aahs” and “oh my god’s!” than any Vivid Porn movie starring Jenna Jameson. The car is capable of an astounding zero to getting two hot blondes in your bed with a midget filming the entire event in approximately 2.3 seconds, give or take few drinks. It comes with two six-speed transmission options; a F1A semi-blindly fast automatic paddle shift system or the much-refined version of the “clearly ridiculously fast” F1 system in the 360.”
The big issue on a car like this is maintenance. You have to get it done at the dealership. Once again the men get the massive ego stroke followed quickly by the bill. The average cost of an oil change on this car is approximately $8,000. That’s a tremendous value compared to the $10,000 oil change the Enzo Ferrari needs. Take that you “whiners” on the Mazda boards about your dealership costs. I’m saying this because my literary agent assured me this article would never be reproduced on a Mazda Enthusiasts Discussion board.
TM3 Times #8 - March 2009
). And that reason was:
Two 2010 Mazda 3’s!
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Originally Posted by 1flycdnM3
lol
